Facebook: Let Me Think For Myself

After another day of thinking this through, I have decided not to leave Facebook…at least not today. I want to be connected to my friends and family far and near – and Facebook really is a good mechanism for that.

Thanks to several people who have taken the time to find various fixes, I am satisfied enough with the NewsFeed (for today anyway) to brave another day in relationship with this website. I am also thankful that Blackberry has not released an update for Facebook on my phone to coincide with the changes Facebook made. In fact, I may not allow my boiphren, as we affectionately call my phone, to ever update Facebook on my phone. Ever.

At least Blackberry still gives me some say in how I view that part of my life…

I realized why I am he most angry at Facebook (aka “Mark-y” as I now refer to Zucker…berg for whom I am a big sucker); it is because he won’t let me think for myself. Like an abusive boyfriend (refer to yesterday’s post for more…), Facebook wants to control my view of MY world. He wants to decide who the most important (“top feeds”) person is…and he has no place doing that. Control! Control!! Control!!!

Seriously – if I had a friend who let her boyfriend create her world based entirely on his interpretation of HER world, I would drag her to an abuse shelter and hide her from that horrible wretch! If he slapped her in the face (ignoring any market research, Marky…), I would step between them and slap him back.

But we stand for this from a website. Why? Because Facebook, like that abusive boyfriend, has become such a great asset to us SOMETIMES. Facebook will make it up to us – give us MisicBook (as if Pandora and Grooveshark aren’t enough…) and remind us how much we need him (all of our contacts are now stored with him). “Come back,” he will say to us smoothly. “I really am better than GooglePlus.” And he might be! It would be so hard to change boyfriends! We would have to convince our 63 or 2,000 friends to change boyfriends too. For a while, we might have to have two boyfriends – hiding one from the other – until we can finally say goodbye.

I do not like to be a complainer without having answers to the problem, but I feel like my hands are tied. This is SO unhealthy!!! I cannot believe that I, a very rationale woman, cannot break up with Facebook.

Anyone else? What are we going to do? I guess I will just wait to see what he tosses my way next and decide then. That’s a great idea, isn’t it? Put off today what I can decide tomorrow … Facebook, you assist me in my nutty self: codependent, indecisive, and now it seems – a procrastinator. I guess you do have a purpose: I can now blame YOU for all of my issues instead of taking responsibility for myself.

Thank you, Facebook. You are a good boyfriend!

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